I was having panic attacks on what my topic would be for the TBR, then I remember the CBC I had last week, and boy, was I afraid of the needle!
As tears were running down my face, my son was laughing that mommy was crying while having CBC, when he doesn't even flinched when he had one last month. And my husband's hand had nail marks on it, it would have been teethmarks ! It was that painful. And the waiting for the result was most agonizing, Im afraid to see the platelet count. Dengue Fever is having a party here in our island. Walang sina-santo, bata ug tiguwang!
Yes! I will admit it now, I'm afraid of needles..... medical needles in particular. There's something on the IV needle that makes may stomach curl and the syringe needle, ugh! i hate the pointed menacing look.
I've had my share of sticking needles to other patients, and it doesn't bother me. I even stick it in the eye and Im steady as a stick. But how come when it's your turn to be prick, hell just breaks loose.
Doctors, are you afraid of the needles?
Doctors can get sick too. We are not exempted from aches, fevers,cold, you can include cancer, tumors, and TB too.
And I thought, this could be a nice topic for the TBR.
Are we afraid to be sick? Are we afraid to treat our family?
Are we afraid to treat our fellow MD's?
Ok, angkunon na lang nako. I'm afraid to treat them. I'm afraid to make mistakes, you see for every treatment choice for them, you have to think a million times of the various side effects and complications before you actually order it. You have to be cerebral about it. But we're sometimes ruled by our emotions. On the other hand, if the modalities you ordered came out undesirable, you will be blamed to death by those you loved. You will lose friends and referrals. They will not listen to your argument of the difference between complications and side-effects. To them, you simply failed. Ugghh!
On the other hand, whenever my son (katong baby pa siya) had fever, i always panic and over-react. I most often grab the highest generation of antibiotics. Then, after a day, fever subsided and his pedia would often tell me, simple hydration would have done the job. Looking back on this, again, I'm afraid that I would be blamed that I haven't done my best as a doctor-mother.
Or I am the only one feeling this way?